Revengeful Cooking Never Works
by dudems
Summary: New Story! Written in Rei’s POV, What happens when the Bladebreakers manage to get involved in professional competitive cooking...Pure and utter disaster...R


**Revengeful cooking never works**

**By:**** Dudems **

**Summary:**** Written in Rei's POV, What happens when the Bladebreakers manage to get involved in professional competitive cooking...Pure and utter disaster**

**Disclaimer:**** All characters that appear in the anime series Beyblade do not belong to me; Fox Spirit owns all the words quoted by the majestics (taken from her fan fiction 'Trapped at Kai's') and I own the plot and this fan fiction.**

Have you ever wondered how five fully grown boys- wait I mean four and a half (Kenny hasn't fully…how should I say 'blossomed' yet) could cause more destruction in a 12X14 room that a whole small highly populated country under war.

One word…cooking.

I can tell you that the Bladebreakers paired with cooking have had an _interesting_ effect on many kitchens worldwide. Take for example our encounter with Kai's kitchen earlier on in the year. 

A perfectly healthy and rather expensive kitchen might I add, not a thing wrong with it, and yet after a few hours with us in it, Kai's kitchen became Kai's kitchen _the deceased _(RIP) 

By the way I'm talking _literally _deceased, the next morning Kai had to call in some builders to refit the whole kitchen, and it was so bad they couldn't even salvage a spoon (thank god Voltaire was out of the country)

That was perhaps our most infamous kitchen disaster, but you can read all about that in detail some other time because the event has been preserved, from Kai's recollection 'Trapped at Kai's' by Foxspirit© the best seller was published.

Anyway by now you've probably gathered that we're not exactly the world's greatest or cleanest chefs and normally that wouldn't matter, except this isn't a normal matter…no this time its an exception. You see this time our cooking has been dragged to a completely new level, competitive professional cooking.

Oh I can see that smirk growing on your lips, you think that we aren't good enough for the professional cooking world (well you're right) but I'm sure everyone has blown up a kitchen at least once in their lives, I mean just because we messed up a _few_ kitchen's doesn't mean we don't have talent.

I Rei Kon have a good grasp of the basics, having spent a summer with my uncle at his restaurant. Kai despite appearing to have been born with a board up his ass can roll a mean sushi and so I can bet you there is more spice waiting to come out of his fingers (after all this whole mess was _his_ idea, (but you'll find out about that later). Maxi, the sweet toothed blonde has consumed so much sugar in his fifteen years of life that he has the ability to know exactly what brand, type and amount of sugar a dessert contains. Tyson has tasted I guarantee near to almost every dish in the world (though I don't see how he can actually taste the essence of the dish gulping it down like that) and finally Kenny our much loved computer geek, with his super computer skills, that can help us win this years Master Chef Competition by finding the greatest recipe combinations with his internet search skills.

Let me start this story on a spring afternoon, three months before the Master Chef Competition finals, where the Bladebreakers and the Majestics were sat in a downtown café on some really large comfy chairs, indulging in a mix of hot drinks and sugary snacks as a treat from Mr Dickinson. 

The conversation was pretty dry for two reasons. Firstly we all know it's virtually impossible to talk about something that Robert would find _intellectually stimulating _and un-uncouth (is that even a word?) and secondly because whenever they opened their mouths, all I could hear was a distant _Blah blah blah…_so we're all pretty zoned out. Robert and Johnny had set up their portable, special edition glass chess set and were playing while carefully sipping Mochachinos. Tyson on the other hand was in the midst of slurping and gulping hot chocolate, max was counting sugar sachets, Enrique was flirting with the waitress and Oliver was experimenting with coffee beans to create the future Ollie-chino. Me and Kai were seated observing the others (in other words…doing nothing)

At this point the whole lot of us were oblivious to the saga that would unfold minutes later, re-igniting the rivalry between the two teams. 

After a few minutes more of sipping and slurping in awkward silence, Oliver's butler walked into the café, suit and hair immaculate and smartly standing ready to address his master.

"Yes Gustav?" Oliver asked, looking up from his table full of exquisite beans. 

"Sir your monthly edition of PC has arrived"

This sparked an interest with Kenny as he immediately cut in surprised. "I never knew you were interested in computers Oliver!"

A disgusted snort escaped Oliver's mouth, "Computers? This is PC as in Pro-chef…"

Robert cackled suddenly, "Only one so uncouth would take an interest in such vile machinery"

Even I, who laughs at Kenny's love for computers found Robert's comment offensive. I mean nobody insults him about his interests, god only knows how boring and outdated they might be.

So when Tyson spoke out in Kenny's defence I felt a slight inner support for his cause, if only I had known what it would lead to, I would have got the hell away from that downtown café.

Anyway, Kenny blushed in embarrassment from Robert's snide comment burying his head in a nearby menu. Tyson stood up roughly; chocolate milk had formed a moustache on his upper lip but that didn't stop him, he pouted his lips slightly and began batting his eye lids femininely, in a high pitched voice he mimicked tauntingly, "I just love to cook and read PC and wear dresses and make-up, oh and my name's Olivia"

I smirked as he crossed his arms defiantly, "AT LEAST KENNY ISN'T A WANNABE GIRL!"

Enrique chose to return to the table at that moment (poor boy) "Girl! Where!" 

I had to laugh at that, even max was giggling softly and I could see out of the corner of my eye a sardonic smile plastered on Kai's lips.

"I, Tyson am not even going to bother retorting to your ridiculous comments. The likes of neither you nor your pitiful friends could not even begin to fathom the artistic technique of cooking" Oliver glared, flicking through the magazine.

I couldn't believe it, but Kai joined the immature argument, "Rei can cook"

"Pshhht…cook my ass!" Johnny stated laughing so hard, almost crying, "Don't…you…remember…the kitchen incident!" he choked in between sobs and laughs. 

"Hey! How'd he know about that?" Max asked slightly annoyed.

I rolled my eyes, finally contributing to the fiery conversation, "Max, it's published in a book…"

Until now I had remained silent, then it suddenly hit me, they were mocking _my_ cooking skills, and I didn't need protecting like Kenny, I could stand up for myself!

"I can cook!" –well that was a great comeback Kon. I mentally hit myself for saying the first thing that came to my stupid mind.

Johnny began to laugh even harder at that, _"Right…aha…right!"_ pulling out a hardback copy of 'Trapped at Kai's' –god were they that obsessed they even carried around a copy- Johnny began to quote (might I add…I was horrified at that) 

_"He walked into his kitchen, only to wish that he had never gotten off his bed. Max, Rei, Tyson, and Kenny had each taken a corner of the kitchen to work in. Tyson was trying to clean up another mess, Max was fighting the smoke emerging from the microwave, and Kenny was covered in flour-"_

"Oh my, and they say they can cook!" Oliver threw in.

"Wait listen to this:

'_Kenny tried to throw some of his cookie dough at Tyson. Too bad for him it was too sticky to fly off his fingers.  
Rei continued cooking his meal peacefully, thinking they were being immature, until Kenny finally got his dough to fly off his hand...landing on the back of Rei's head.  
"Who threw it?!" Rei shouted, picking up some of his food with a spoon. The Bladebreakers (minus Kai) all pointed at each other. Tyson had the sense to point at Rei.  
"Tyson how could it have been me?!" Rei yelled again, deciding it was Tyson. He flung his dinner across the kitchen, landing on Tyson's arm.'_

I could feel my cheeks burning as he spewed out each of those humiliating words. Why oh why had Kai sold our story for evil sadistic bastards to read (oh yeah…to pay for the new kitchen) I looked around and could see Kai and Tyson fuming, glaring openly at the four majestics who were sat laughing hysterically.

"God almighty, they really are professional chefs" Robert sarcastically added chuckling all the while.

Tyson stood and clenched his gloved fist suddenly and I knew this was one of his 'moments'

"That's enough! You think you're so good, you just wait we'll prove you wrong. WE CAN COOK!"

"Ok, then, you'll have no problem entering this" the flame haired boy snatched Oliver's magazine and pointed at an article on the yearly master chef competition.

Before I even had the chance to register what was going on, Kai, of all people Kai opened his big mouth, "We'll do it"

I know he hates the majestics but could he have made a bigger mistake EVER? How were we, the idiots of the cooking realm (and this was proved in black and white by that book) ever supposed to beat _them._ And uncle had told me about those competitions, there was high competition! What chance did we stand!

And then Robert just had to make it a hundred times worse, that purple haired fool that looked like he had just walked out of star trek, could I land a nice punch on his jaw right now…

He just had to snobbishly add, "Then you should also know Oliver is the reigning cooking world champion"

Ah the pain of that statement! The money-crazed brats left, leaving us to worry about our unfortunate future.

"Wha…what have you done KAI!" I started pretty annoyed by now.

"I-"

Kenny looked pained, Max looked terrified muttering such whispers of- "I don't want to die" rocking to and fro.

Tyson's mouth opened and shut like a distressed goldfish probably realising he would have to come in contact with another kitchen.

All I can say is we're doomed. Absolutely utterly, bloody doomed. We'll be publicly humiliated on Television! We'll probably scar young children world wide from our appalling cooking…and did I say we're DOOMED! All because of that blue triangled freak Kai. God how I could kill him…choke him with that innocent white scarf of his…grrrr.

**Well that's just the prologue, the real fun starts when they get competing and fretting. I hope you enjoyed that, it's not really my usual writing style, but I was trying something different. Two things, please review (I need cheering up from these icky exams and my illness) and secondly the 'book' that was mentioned in this chapter, is actually a fan fiction written by Fox Spirit. It had me laughing head over heels, so I would highly recommend you read it (called 'trapped at kai's')**

**So thanks for reading and pleeeease leave a review…**

**~dudems**

**PS. For those of you who read my other stories because of my A-levels at the moment I'm on a hiatus but I'll be back in June. *sob sob***


End file.
